Just like Alice falling down the rabbit hole, unraveling the real story behind the Northwest/Delta Airlines crew who forgot to land at MSP just keeps getting curiouser and curiouser. Brings to mind the gap in the Nixon Watergate tapes. If that doesn’t ring a bell, just assume it has to do with people trying to cover something up. Unconfirmed reports from DC actually said the CVR tape on the Airbus was blank … as in erased.
Retired American Airlines pilot Jim Tillman told CNN’s Anderson Cooper the other night that the passengers were never in any real danger. REALLY? Once you pass the destination, the Airbus FMS switches to heading mode and would have made the Airbus continue toward Canada … until the airplane ran out of fuel. The only reason we can even poke a little fun at these two buffoons is that no one was hurt.
So in the interest of performing a valuable public service, to help everyone who flies regularly deal with the anxiety of wondering whether their pilots are awake and on duty the next time they see that bank vault of a cockpit door close before the push back, here are the Top 10 Reasons why the NWA crew might have missed dozens of radios calls and SELCAL alerts.
Number 10: They were texting
Number 9: It had something to do with sex
Number 8: Each pilot thought the airplane knew the way since Airbus aircraft are all automated anyway
Number 7: They really did just fall asleep
Number 6: They couldn’t decide who should have the Nintendo Wii next
Number 5: It had something to do with sex or money
Number 4: It had something to do with sex and money
Number 3: They were trying to understand NWA’s new slogan, ” We’ll get you within 150 miles of there.”
Number 2: The pilots actually have no idea why they weren’t paying attention
And the Number 1 reason why the NWA crew missed landing at Minneapolis: They were abducted by aliens, but were returned an hour later because even the little green men couldn’t stand to listen to these two guys whine about the company any longer.
Of course, these opinions do not necessarily represent those of Northwest or Delta Airlines. Did I miss any?
Rob Mark, editor